Soft Sanctuary Introduction, by Bella Milroy

Part of Soft Sanctuary Season

Soft Sanctuary began with a simple premise offered to me by Maria Brewster of At the Library/Rule of Threes back in 2019, when I was asked to create a day in the library based on the idea of “people having a nice time”. What a concept! As an artist, this felt like such a rare opportunity to get to explore ideas of pleasure, leisure, rest and care in ways that feel wondrously expansive and yet beautifully simple. The idea of holding this event at Bootle Library added a whole new dimension of excitement to the project. The nature of these  essential, social and democratic spaces instantly offers a more accessible format of engagement for the people that use it every day, and there is something really fascinating about the sense of safety that the library offers. A core part of my own creative practice as a disabled artist is continually inspired by concepts of public and private spaces, and where the sick and/or disabled body exists within them. What motivated me to consider what to include as part of this “nice day” for library goers and creatives alike, was to take advantage of the safety found within the public nature of the library. I wanted to explore some of the practices used to create a similar sense of safety and security within personal and domestic spaces; methods which are often used as a way to combat the stresses, strains, hardships and pains of everyday life. My ambition was to take these small and often private moments of magic, and hold them tenderly within the safe, publicness of the library. I wanted to give it a table, a collection of hands to chop and mouths to feed, where people gather and think on the space between them and the bodies that exist there. I wanted to make room for these practices to be celebrated. 

So much of life, particularly life lived under pandemic, is a scrambling of resources – personal, social and institutional. These means are so often few and far between, and reflect the threadbare existence of Austerity-Britain, compounded by the crisis of COVID-19, and a reality that is painfully familiar to many of you reading this I am sure. Set amongst this backdrop, daily life can just end up being a continual effort (of varying degrees of success) just to keep it all at bay. “It” being the immeasurable number of demands, commitments, expectations, requirements, compromises and negotiations of life. This can certainly be the case for life lived with chronic illness and disability, and was the driving force behind how I wanted to centre, celebrate and rejoice in the practices found within experiences of this. I wanted to make room, and give credit to the ways in which these techniques are powerfully transformative in moments of anguish and discomfort. They are methods that create scope for profound moments of pleasure and cheer in our day-to-day lives, and it has been a privilege to be able to share them with you in this programme. 

And so what began with the premise of a nice time for a day in the library, turned into 3 days across the autumn of 2019, and has since evolved into a collection of interviews and podcasts marking World Mental Health Day in October 2020. The iteration of the programme that emerges before you in now, in the spring of 2021, has been a process that has taken a very long and winding road to get to. As a disabled artist, I feel it not only important but necessary to thank Maria Brewster, Niamh Riordan and Laura Yates for their patience and expertise in supporting my need to take the long way round in getting here. As someone who’s capacity wanes from moment to moment, knowing I can rely upon the trusted support and understanding from this team of good, good people, is something I am incredibly grateful for. They are genuinely dedicated to flexibility and care, and it’s reflected in the practice they foster in every aspect of their work. Throughout the pandemic, they have continued to connect and support local Bootle and Sefton residents, ensuring their participation is not only made possible, but continues to be a valued and crucial part of the way At the Library exists. They have gone door-to-door offering hard copies of the programme, all parceled up in moments of connection and continued, creative exploration. These efforts are not only a wonder to witness, but a vital component of keeping the communal essence of the library alive as its physical doors remain closed, supporting residents with limited or non-existent access to the internet as the world has shifted online almost overnight. The space they make for adaptability and alternative modes of operating is not given as a luxury or an exception of additional support, it’s how they as a team operate, and it’s something that flows out to support all the other disabled artists throughout this project. 

So, soppy confessions of glee and eternal admiration out of the way, what does Soft Sanctuary have in store for you?! Well, currently existing on the website are a number of podcasts and interviews between myself, At the Library members Laura Yates and Maria Brewster, and writer Steph Niciu. We discuss disabled joy, navigating every-day ableism, and what drives us to create, curate and deliver participatory art in library contexts. These conversations are a lovely soft place to sit and think about roles of care, our bodies capacity and the wonder of library spaces – perfect to sit and listen to with a cuppa.

Kicking off the programme with a live screening event, is the film, “Methods Of Care: Ramen Edition”

This short film was made in collaboration between the Chopping Club’s Greg Herbert and Niamh Riordan, and artists Kyla Harris and Bella Milroy, as part of the Sick Day Banquet series: a collection of recipes designed by disabled artists, celebrating their ideal sick day foods: comforting, accessible meals which prioritise joy. Since the beginning of the year, Bella and Kyla have been recording a conversation over Voice Notes, about sick day foods, cooking, care, and their experiences of hiring and living with Personal Assistants (PAs). The film weaves together this conversation with footage of a virtual cook along, in which Niamh and Kyla cook Kyla’s recipe for ‘Comfort Ramen’ together over Zoom – Kyla directing Niamh through every detail of the recipe.

Join us for a relaxed tea-time screening over Zoom on 22 March at 6:00 – 7.30pm, with time afterward to chat about the film. Guests are also welcome to bring their own food during the screening to enjoy together. Why not try Kyla’s ramen recipe here, or bring along any other food of your choice to eat whilst we watch. 

I’d like to thank Kyla Harris for her enthusiasm to work with us in producing this piece (sharing voice-notes together was such a highlight of this creative process!); Greg Herbert for his particular dedication in the editing of this film; as well as Niamh Riordan’s warmth and impeccable coordination in pulling off this feat of a collaboration. It was really special working with you all!

We have also taken this core, in-person element of the original programme of The Sick Day Banquet, and transformed it into a collection of recipes and writing from each of the commissioned artists. In it, you can find delicious recipes from that first series of events in 2019, plus new editions filled with every ingredient to wet your appetite! The collection, which features both practical recipes and some beautiful short essays, is a delightful window into these practices, and creatively expands upon what food means to us. Find all the recipes online, as well as a limited number of printed copies that are available upon request. To request a free printed copy to be posted to you, please email hello@atthelibrary.co.uk

You can find the zine, “Access As Meditation”, which is a selection of text and images in the shape of a love letter to the process of creating image descriptions and closed captions. Inspired by creating these vital access components that accompanied my instagram posts and stories, the piece takes these digital moments as prompts to meditate on our surroundings as to what it is we are experiencing in the moment. You can read the piece here, and we also have a limited number of printed copies, which can be posted to you. To request a free printed copy to be posted to you, please email hello@atthelibrary.co.uk

You can also continue to find the coloring book, “When I Feel Bad” originally designed by @invalid_art. It’s a wonderful piece that I continue to return to again and again, bringing together different tools and words of advice for making yourself feel better on bad days, offering methods to assist with general mental health maintenance. ‘When I Feel Bad’ was initially commissioned by At the Library in 2019, but is available for anyone to download and use from the website as part of Soft Sanctuary.

All written pieces are accompanied by audio descriptions found throughout the website, and plain text versions are also available to avoid download limits. 

I have loved compiling these works together for this next iteration of Soft Sanctuary, and would love to hear what you make of it all – we hope you enjoy what it has to offer!

Special thanks go to all the commissioning artists featured throughout the programme, and also to those whom I was lucky enough to consult with as part of its production. Working with disabled artists is such a joy, and it makes me really happy to be able to share their work with you. They have all worked incredibly hard to produce these brilliant pieces. They contributed to the programme amongst the challenges of fluctuating capacities, whilst living through the stresses of a pandemic – their efforts are hugely appreciated. We are grateful for the honesty, vulnerability and pleasure found in their work.

Leah Clements

Kyla Harris

@invalid_art

Raisa Kabir

Bella Milroy

Romily Alice Walden 

Steph Niciu

Maria Oshodi

Hannah Wallis